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Accountability

When I sort of accidentally began this journey, accountability was a big thing for me. I talked about it. Owned it. Showed it. Through daily full body Instagram photos, I am holding myself accountable to myself and to (I’d like to think) the world for my fitness and health, whether I do or don’t meet my goals for that day, week or whatever.

Just recently, I’ve begun adding food pics to the mix, which I had been doing from time to time before, but that’s when I was flaky about it all and could easily have had a salad for lunch and fried chicken and mashed potatoes for dinner. You’d see the pretty picture of the salad, but you wouldn’t see and I wouldn’t speak of the fried chicken.

I guess it’s like the proverbial tree in the forest. If I eat it and no one’s around to witness it, does that mean it didn’t happen? Well, I knew that couldn’t last because even if I didn’t post pictures of every meal, I repeat, I post full body shots of myself every single day, so you would know something went awry, somewhere. I wouldn’t be telling the truth. I wouldn’t be telling my truth. And there are many parts to my truth.

The truth is, if this were five days ago, I’d have either a vodka cranberry or a glass of wine in my hand. And if I’m going to tell the truth, five days ago, I DID have a vodka cranberry in my hand, and followed it up with several more. And let’s just throw a couple of shots of tequila in there for sport, because that happened, too.

Also, a hangover happened, and though I’ve posted a vicious hangover selfie on Instagram, I made sure I got myself together before I posted my daily shot, and I still went walking/jogging.

I haven’t had a drink since Sunday and that’s in part because I’ve been thinking a lot about this accountability thing and also because a friend challenged me to a strict seven day fitness thingy that doesn’t allow for alcohol.

It’s been easy. Unbelievably easy until today, when my day wasn’t so good, when my relationship isn’t glowing that perfect glow, when I’m so annoyed/pissed/mad/sad that I just want to numb myself with a vodka neat or a whole bottle of wine. And yes, I can take down a whole bottle…and a half.

So, far I’m resisting. Sipping iced water and channeling this negative energy into new words and promoting Can’t Get Enough. And I think I’m able to resist mostly out of stubbornness and a small part of me thinks it may be an around about attempt at sabotage because my husband of course lives with me, knows my habits, my weaknesses and unfortunately, my triggers.

It’s good to get that off my chest. I’ll let  you know how it turns out tomorrow. Honestly.

Easy like…

vodka

…feel free to take it from there, but let me tell you, nothing about this Sunday is easy, not for me anyway. I knew it had been a few days since I updated here, but a whole week?! Wow, I had no idea. And in the meantime, so many readers, blogger and reviewers were happily participating in the Can’t Get Enough blog tour, including the Trollop With A Laptop herself, Alison Tyler, who posted this colorful interview with me on her blog yesterday, while I was busy shuttling the twin to the sitter, driving to a book signing…

booksa

…signing one (tee hee) book and driving back, picking up twins, picking up dinner then coming home where it began storming and the power went out.

And that was just yesterday. Today I planned to stay in bed all day and rest because I was bold, no foolish enough to wear heels yesterday, and apparently I must atone for that today. However, instead of resting and recovering peacefully, I’m having to deal with the difficult tenant I’ve been avoiding mentioning to much over the past year (because I’m such a fucking lady) because after avoiding being served with a notice of eviction, she finally got served, then tells me that she needs more than ten days. Not because she doesn’t have anywhere to go, mind you, but because she doesn’t feel like moving her stuff.

Really, she doesn’t feel like it? Well, you know what I don’t feel like? Paying mortgage on a home that I’m not living in and not being reimbursed for it and having it torn all to hell to boot. So, yeah, that’s going on right now, but I’m trying to put my energy elsewhere.

Like this creative spurt I’m going through right now. While the power was out yesterday evening, I entertained my husband by reading him the beginnings of some things I’m working on. One story is a comedy in addition to being erotic, and the first paragraph made him laugh out loud. That was cool.

But speaking of Alison Tyler, one of several things I did on Friday (indcluding having tires changed, ugh!) was visit the Atlanta bookstore Charis Books where I spotted her Dark Secret Love on display on the shelf. I couldn’t resist snapping this picture and tweeting and tagging her.

darksecret

She wrote about it on her blog today.

I know this is a super long post, but I had a lot of catching up to do. I haven’t even mentioned that Rose Caraway announced the winners of her give away on Friday! And she did it in such a unique and clever way!

Thanks, Rose, thank everyone, and thanks if you made it through this post!

Ali’s Addiction, Alison’s Wrap-Up and Acworth, GA

I got an early start this morning (read-I didn’t go back to sleep after the hubs went to work). I stayed up and finished answering some interview questions for something so exciting that I wish I could tell you all about, but I can’t yet, and sent them in. Speaking of which, the three hour time difference between my publishers and I really works in my favor. I have emails for them three or four hours before they’re scheduled to be at work, so it makes me feel super productive and shit.

Moving right along, today’s stop on the Can’t Get Enough blog tour is at Ali’s Addiction. She excerpts from Beatrix Ellroy’s Before They Burn, a delightful (and hot) little baking story, and she gives you the opportunity to win a copy of my book. Now, why wouldn’t you stop on by?

Also happening is my second Books-A-Million signing, this time in Acworth, GA. So, if you’re in or around the area tomorrow afternoon, I would love it if you would come to:

Books-A-Million #106
3372 North Cobb Parkway
Acworth, GA 30101
2-4 p.m.

Yesterday, Alison Tyler included my in her Wrap-Up blog, where she mentioned the recent release of Summer Loving (an anthology created specifically for and all proceeds going to the wonderful Sommer Marsden and her family) in which my story, An Oven On Broil is included.

summer

She also spoke about Open, the book on which my name first appeared on a cover! Thanks much, Alison!

open

Busy, busy today. More interview questions to answer and blog posts to write, but if I’m at the keyboard, that’s the best kind of busy of all!

On signing books, guest blogging and being called a “Breakout editor…”

I feel like much of my days are spent playing catch up. For a while there, I was on a roll, posting in sync with daily blog tour stops, updating everyone on new events and appearances, etc. And then I took what I didn’t intend to be a break, but turned out to be one, and now here I am, with so much to tell all at once.

First, yesterday’s blog tour stop. It was at author Annabeth Leong’s place and I wrote a guest post about cars and sex, one of the many sub themes in Can’t Get Enough. You can see it here if you missed it yesterday.

We also earned our 6th 5 star Amazon review yesterday. Very flattering. One of the best yet. Here it is.

Secondly, the book signing. It was this past Saturday at a Books-A-Million in Lawrenceville, GA. By that time I had done a one and a half hour reading with a wonderful group of ladies and was less shaky about appearing in public. Plus, I wouldn’t be required to say the words fuck, pussy or cock in a crowded room. All I had to do was sit there, a table with my books stacked in front of me and wait for the customers to come by, pick up a book and have me sign it. Except, for the first hour plus, I didn’t sign anything.

Well, that’s not completely true. Within the first ten minutes a woman approached me excitedly and asked for my autograph (not in a book, but in her little notebook where she collects them, but still…). I happily gave it to her though I’m still getting used to autographing things and am pretty insecure about my penmanship when do so. But anyway, she asked for a hug which I gladly gave. Hugs are easy. Hugs are reassuring, I can do hugs with no problem. I forgot to take her picture though.

In the last thirty minutes a woman came by and bought a book for herself and one for her book club. That made me extremely happy. Then, who I eventually found out was Gary Wit Da Tea from The Rickey Smiley Show came by, bought a book and took a picture with me. He also bought both my signing mates book (it was Lewis Ericson, BTW). My day was made after that, and then it was time for me to go.

tenandgary

Over the weekend an idea had been brewing in my mind re: marketing and I’m thinking and hoping something will happen with that soon. But, the hubs Googled me today and saw this.

I’m sure there are words sufficient enough to describe how unbelievable happy and proud this makes me, but right now, I just don’t have them. All I have is this feeling of shock and awe. Oh, and nerves out of this world.

Meet me tonight…

Is the invitation as sexy as it sounds? Why, yes, yes it is. Tonight’s reading, my very first reading ever after writing and publishing erotica for over ten years, is at Charis Books in Atlanta, Georgia. If you live in the area, just passing through, want to take an impromptu flight out or whatever, the reading is from 7:30 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. The address is:

1189 Euclid Ave.
Atlanta, GA 30307

I waited until, oh, about three a.m. to get nervous about it. Sat straight up in the bed like I was late for something. But, every one in the house was sleeping soundly, and because I’m so polite I was very quiet with my freak out.

And to add to it, I checked my Twitter feed (because everyone does at 3 a.m.) and saw that Rubicon Reader (my absolute favorite reviewer and Jeep lover) had congratulated me on a literary award nomination. Now, I tend to question not only my sight, but my sanity at 3 in the morning so it took a minute for it to register. Then I followed the link and saw this.

To say that I’m not only surprised, but extremely honored doesn’t even begin to describe this feeling. However this happened, I am grateful, and thank you.

I also thank you all for every review, retweet and favorite when it comes to my incessant tweeting and talking about Can’t Get Enough.

Love you guys, but must go and vomit now.

I’m Coming Out

Luckily, I’ve been too busy online promoting the book to think about upcoming face to face promotion. And to fret about it, which kind of blows because the stress weight loss would have done me good.

Anyway, here it is, where it all begins. I have two readings/meet and greets/signings this week alone.

And for the first time it’s occurred t i me that for ten + years I’ve been in hiding, well, not exactly hiding, but not promoting other than online,

online, and in other people’s books where showing my face wasn’t a requirement.

And I’m excited, I really am. Interacting, reading, signing. Easy peasy. You’ll find that after a cocktail or two I’m a real people person.

But what to wear? What about my hair? What if I’m not what everyone expected?

I guess it’s the literary equivalent to stage fright, and something I’ll have to get over rather quickly because in three days I’ll have my first appearance.

I joked about practicing my signature, and I really should have because my handwriting is rather shitty.

And reading, I haven’t selected a story and haven’t read anything a loud since before my kids could read themselves.

Damn… ill prepared much?

Either way, see you (and me) there.

 

Just Ask…

desi

You can, you know. And most times, I mean it. Like now, when several writers and bloggers chose to interview me as opposed to posting blurbs and excerpts (all that is great, too, keep it coming – and I love the giveaways!).

And I don’t play favorites (seriously, I don’t) , but I especially love question and answer sessions, even when they’re not especially personal, but I do get to give my point of view.

See, for some reason, I always feel the need to explain myself. Even when no one’s asked for an explanation. I like to “back it up” if you will, with more information, with a little peek into my brain, the way I see it. You know.

And today, with the wonderful Malin James on Day 6 of the Can’t Get Enough blog tour, I got to do just that, or at least let her know some behind the scenes details on just how Can’t Get Enough came to be. Why I chose the stories I chose, what my motivation was behind the collection.

I love the way it turned out and I hope you will, too. Here you go.